Never would I categorize myself as someone who enjoys waking up early and starting my day bright eyed and bushy tailed. For my thirty-one years on this planet, I have been non-bushy tailed before 9am, which is probably a liberal estimate, 9am doesn’t even look all that great to me.
I relied on coffee, a routine that I could do with my eyes closed, and not speaking to anyone to get me back to the human race each morning. It didn’t always work, there were mornings that I would give anything to go back to sleep, and heaven forbid anyone interrupt my morning structure. When Justin started to not feel well in December, his morning routine completely flipped on him and we were fighting for time in the morning, pushing each other out of the bathroom. It started to become part of our new morning routine, I had to adjust to having him up and moving in the morning. I genuinely appreciated the extra time I had in the morning to talk to him, but keep in mind AM Emily isn’t the interested in chatting. Justin understands that, he always has, and he gave me as much room to slug through my morning routine as he could.
As our life calmed down after moving into our new house, I found that my morning routine was again in need of an adjustment. The muscle memory that is associated with going through a repetitious routine is highly underrated. The first day I went back to work I found myself so frustrated because things weren’t in the same spot they always had been. I was reaching for cabinets that no longer exist, had to backtrack to remember where I stored certain things, and had to adjust to getting ready in the bathroom right across the hall from where Justin and Bruno are sleeping. I made it to work on time but I felt so uneasy all morning because I had no structure to my morning, there was nothing that reminded me that I was on the right track, keeping the right pace, and would make it to work in the morning on time. I’m surprised I made it there on time at all.
Our lives are becoming a little less hectic as Justin continues his treatment plan and awaits remission for a bone marrow transplant. This calm before the storm seemed like the perfect opportunity for me build some new morning routines. We’ve been living in our house for a month, I have a better understanding of what kind of time I need in the morning, and I’ve even – against all odds – started waking up around 6am on a regular basis. And to be honest, I don’t hate it.
I have a sunroom that overlooks our entire backyard where I can sip my coffee, watch Morning Joe, and start my day. This setting has been an inspiration for my desire to build a new morning routine, one that includes time for myself. Time to sit, relax, read, write, work, and just wake up so that I can interact with the human race. I’m giving myself one hour each morning. An early morning hour where I can spend some time doing whatever I feel is needed before I go out into the world. Today it was coffee, writing, and Morning Joe.
This new routine will be a work in progress, as excited as I am to have some time to myself each morning and to feel like I am gaining ground on breaking my anti-morning personality – it’s not easy. It took me twenty minutes of convincing myself to get in the shower at 6am this morning so that I had an hour to spare. I really wanted to just sleep for an extra hour on the couch before getting up and hustling to get ready for work. On the flip side, once I sit down and start working on things for myself, it’s hard to get up and start getting ready to go. I mean, sitting on my couch writing for this blog is the dream, right? Maybe someday. In the meantime, I’ll be working on just getting up when I hear my “Canned Heat” alarm go off in the morning without falling back asleep on the couch afterward.
Baby steps toward joining the human race before 9am.